Emotionally unavailable vs. Nonchalant. Being “nonchalant” is just a role people play to perform in dating. Pretending not to care just so people will like you more is actually sick. To maintain power, you must be in control of your emotions, but once you’ve begun to weaponize the other person’s feelings to gain authority and have the upper hand, you’ve gone too far. Calmness and security are what we’d hope for in dating, not a competition between two people who care to prove they don’t care more than one another. Being "emotionally unavailable" but still open to date makes no sense. How can you grow if you’re not willing to feel growing pains? Our brains confuse the task of pursuing and the feeling of confusion with attraction. I won’t settle for confusion, only for security.
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